dear jon,

i spend a lot of time making sure i don't bruise your sentiments, because i care about you and because i know inside you are just a little boy, like omar says in his song. i make sure that you are okay with my little jokes and all the chaffing that i do.

now, i wonder if you think you help me or if you hurt me with all the calls, the e-mails, with the "i just called to say i was think---i'll retract that statement." Sir, what is all that about?!?!?!

how on earth did i fall for you? really. i found it funny that you called me after you had already emailed me twice to ask me who gave me my new dog. in the back of your mind, you thought it was the guy who had me sore, didn't you?

please baby, i know you well.