dear jon,

i need to grow up.

i wrote the following post about a week or two ago, but it has been hiding on my pocket PC, since i've decided to grow up, i think it is most appropiate now.

jonathan,

it is not you I miss, but good times that we had. a part of me wishes it was you I really missed because maybe then I could sulk about a true love lost or something like that, but I can not lie to myself and the truth is is I am over the fact that you can not man up to your feelings and you can not handle being involved with someone at this point in your life. but I do miss the sweet times we had .... I miss seeing your sparkling eyes staring at me, deep with affection, I miss the heat produced by our clasped hands, I miss reciting the mundane details of my daily life to your impartial ears, I miss feeling like sitting in the comfort of your lap was the only place I would want to be, I miss playing with the chinny chin hairs of your goatee. I read somewhere that in getting to "know" people, people often tend to ask questions until they feel they have gotten to the "end" of a person, thus getting to "know them," most of all, I miss NOT asking you incessant questions because although I do feel I know you well, I never sought to find an end with you.

love,

me.